Rhonda "Late" Lee

A storm is nearby. We’ve had a few late-Lee.  The air against my skin is feeling cooler.  I notice the dogs seem a bit concerned as they are pacing back and forth.  Typically we get summer storms at this time of year. The wind blows through the trees creating a symphony of sounds as the wind chimes hanging on a limb in one of them takes center stage.  I love hearing the frogs croak out a chorus of joyful noise and I watch as leaves and pine straw blow by feeling the raindrops teasing me as they dance here and there on my arms much like a canon.  The whole scene is really quite beautiful.  Some people like to sit on their front porch rocking back and forth to the rumble of thunder, while others enjoy the light show only God can create! Each storm is unique. The severity of the storm varies. Some storms come with advanced warnings while other storms can take you by surprise.  My friends and family are keenly aware that storms frighten me. As much as I want to be that person who can sit in the front row and watch them take place before me, I’d rather be safe…inside.  That doesn’t work with every storm, though. I can’t avoid all of life’s storms.

These summer storms have me thinking late-Lee about the many directions our lives can take through the years. Year after year may escape us without any disruption, while others may be compounded with storm after storm.  Some storms may pass through just to wash and cleanse us, while others steal away priceless belongings and loved ones. If you take a moment and read Psalm 107, you will gain a better understanding of the storm God used to show his power and steadfast love and unbelievable forgiveness.  In Psalm 107:29 we find, “He made the storm be still, and the waves of the sea were hushed.” Could you imagine being witness to that command?  But why does it leave me in such awe? The same God who commanded the storms to still and the waves to hush created them.

When my daughters were growing up, I was committed to being honest with them. In doing so, I would tell them when they did good, when they didn’t, and how they needed to work harder to achieve goals.  I didn’t believe in giving them accolades when it wasn’t deserved. I still don’t.  (gasp)  I taught them to work hard to earn what they received and when things didn’t work out the way they wanted, they should always remember that what defines us after we fall is how we rise. You get back up there and try again.  Mistakes and failures are proof you are trying.  Even in their young lives they would experience storms that I couldn’t fix for them nor did I need to. But I believe after reading Psalm 107 that God uses storms to draw us closer to him.  I wanted them to always have a heart for God and for their compass to always lead them to the Bible to seek the answers they need rather than relying on earthly sources.  We’ve tried to do that over the years in dark times like miscarriages, deaths, test failures, hospitalizations, and on and on.  But, know we fail daily.  Sometimes I read scripture and have zero clue what it means. I am not sure if I have ever truly heard God’s voice. I envy those who have. They clearly speak to the instructions he provided them as if they were having a conversation with him in their living room. But, me, I often read scripture, pray earnestly over it for clarity, and I get…N O T H I N G or so I think. 

As a parent, one of the storms we face is when our children leave home.  But as I have watched as one used to make videos while in college of how scripture spoke to her and related it to her life during that time, journals about scripture until she has filled the pages of many books, and the other is committed to teaching her daughter who God is makes this mama’s heart full!   Both of them and those they love keep God center stage in their lives. Even now, when they come to me with a problem we talk about it, but more importantly we focus on prayer.  They share with me often about how God has worked in their lives. Keep in mind that doesn’t mean they (we) always get the answers we want, but we recognize it’s the answer he wants. Sometimes we all lose our way, but we help each other find our way back.  And as parents who have faced the storm of children leaving home, we need to always remember during storms seeds are often scattered and where they land new life blooms! That’s a wonderful thing! 

One of my sisters and I are walking/running through 100 miles in May.  In order for us to meet that challenge we are having to get out of the house and moving every day.  Now, you can imagine (if you’ve read any of my posts)  how my mind saw it when I first agreed to this challenge. The story played out like this:  It’s early in the morning as I awaken.  The birds are chirping and calling out to me to come join them.  I throw on my running shorts and lace up my shoes. I pull my hair into a ponytail and step out…no race out the door.  I create a cool breeze because of the speed I’m running. I can hear the music from Rocky as I’m racing through the month meeting my 100 mile goal by the middle of May so I increase my goal to 200.  At the end of the month, I celebrate by buying myself a new outfit and of course, a new shade of red lipstick! Nice story, huh? The reality of it all is there are days I’m struggling to make it out the door. When I’m out there I may feel fast, but I know I’m moving like the tortoise in the Tortoise and the Hare story. But, hey, I’m out there! 

Late-lee, there has been some ongoing battles between me and some pebbles that find their way into my shoes. I’m not sure how they get there, but while I’m moving, the pebble feels like a boulder as it rolls around in the bottom of my shoe reminding my foot, it’s in charge of the situation. When I stop to remove it, I look at the small size of the pebble and think to myself, “How did you seem so big?” Of course, those pebbles made me think about problems in life. I don’t know about you, but I have problems from time to time. Sometimes they feel so big. They consume my mind with worry. I may lose my appetite, sleep, or get ornery as I grapple with the enormity I feel like I’m facing. I realize that in Matthew 6:25, we are commanded by Jesus not to worry about the needs of this life. Isn’t that verse about not worrying about what we’ll eat or drink? I certainly eat enough food. I’m worried about much bigger things. Things the size of a boulder. I chew on the worry. I analyze it to death. I run all of the scenarios through my mind so I’m prepared for any outcome. I’m a fixer and proud of it!

Fixer or sinner? Gulp, I’m a sinner.  I’ve read somewhere that you will find worry or fear (seen as the same) mentioned in the bible over 365 times.  And nowhere does it say it’s okay. In fact, it’s defined clearly as sin. And, in almost every verse you read, you will be told not to worry or fear and we should lean on the Lord for strength and an inner piece that only He can give you.  So, why do we continue to worry? It’s because if you are like me, we aren’t letting go and letting God.  In Philippians 4:6 we are reminded “ Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”  Every time we feel that jab of worry, we need to go to God in prayer and thanksgiving. I can continue to try and fix things on my own, but in my own flesh I’m simply weak. In God’s hands, I’m strong and so are you.  

So, as I continue my journey to 100 miles this month, I’ll stick to handling the boulders in my shoes and I’ll try my hardest to let God handle the boulders in my life!  There’s no doubt I will relapse in my efforts.  I’m certain I’ll continue to work my problems out in my mind and then will God to fix them my way. I’m sure He will continue to shake his head and get a good laugh watching me trying to control things again. He’ll probably allow another pebble to get in my shoe just to entertain him. 🙂

The other day I was racing (ok, more like a herd of turtles) down the road when I saw them…the cones of change! I knew I was fixin’ to have to detour and it was ruffling my feathers. I had somewhere to be. This detour was not part of my plan.  The road I ended up on took me down an unfamiliar neighborhood of historic homes that were prettier than a litter of speckled pups.   I was captivated by the architecture and colors.   At the end of the detour, I was a little sad because I was certain with my directional challenges I wouldn’t find my way back to this part of town.  Then, it hit me. God must be reminding me I’m trying to control things again and live my plan instead of his. So, he does what he does best with me – he winks and nudges! Has that ever happened to you? Detours don’t just happen on our roadways. They can happen in every aspect of our lives – death of a loved one, a broken relationship, etc. 

So late-Lee, I’ve been on a bit of a career detour.  In the beginning I had no idea what I would be doing as an instructor in a healthcare organization. What on earth was I going to bring to the table? I felt as lost as last year’s Easter egg, but I soon came to the realization that maybe I wasn’t there for the reasons I may have thought.   In the 20 short months I was with the organization, I learned so much. The parallels between being a teacher and working in healthcare are endless. At the heart of all of the work, is a person (whether it be a patient or a student). Every decision, every process, every audit boils down to ensuring the best for that person. 

I often wondered why both of my daughters became nurses.  They were immersed in the world of education from the womb, so how is it they chose such a different path?  After seeing first hand their world, I often puff up with pride like a fancy rooster thinking about the work they were doing. They pour out an enormous amount of sacrifice and heart into every shift. During my time, I witnessed an organization coming together to wage battle against a virus that was determined to wave its victory flag. The markings of N95s impressed upon the faces of front-line staff were visible reminders of the battles they had just fought.  My heart wept for those who lost loved ones and couldn’t be with them and for the staff that held the hands of those who left this earth. I prayed for all as they fought the battles and lived with the fear of taking the virus home to their own loved ones.  The pictures you may have seen on television or on social media, I saw in person and in my own house! I celebrated with people I didn’t know as they received their vaccination. It made them feel stronger! Their gratitude for the teams working the vaccine clinics was beyond measure. It made my heart full!

As I now ready myself for a more familiar journey, I thank God for this detour. I have tremendous respect for those in healthcare. I remain in awe of the compassionate care provided by those in this field.  Every role and every department in the organization matters.  I trusted God as he took me on this detour and I realize now I may not have been there to have an impact on the organization, but rather for the organization to have an impact on me.  I have new friends as a result of this detour and a better understanding of the world my daughters chose. I’m leaving thankful for this time! 

Our mindsets shape the way we view the detours we encounter!  We can grip the steering wheel with white knuckles and scowls like we have a burr in our saddle or we can relax and view them with an open mind and an open heart.  At the end of the detour, we will often find our lives have been enriched by the experience. God makes no mistakes!

I was in the parking lot of one of my favorite stores the other day cruising around slowly trying to grab a close spot because it was raining.  I saw a car backing out so I readied mysyelf to grab this spot with a victorious feeling. As I veered out slightly so I could park nice and straight, a car came in from the other side and stole it from me! The nerve! Sadly, I had to park further away and ended up entering the store soaked…and let’s be real, I wasn’t thinking nice thoughts about my mysterious parking space thief! 

Has that ever happened to you? You feel like your happy thoughts were seized and held captive by an army of darkness. I’m willing to bet you have. Some of us (including me at times) have a hard time shaking it. I struggle with putting negative comments or worries out of my head  so they persistently replay like a broken record reminding me over and over I’m just not worthy or I may be lacking in something.   I’m disappointed that I even allow myself to surrender to these types of thoughts. I mean I am always preaching  to others about checking out the bright side of things, but the reality is that I, too, get down sometimes.  I just choose not to stay in that gloomy spot for very long.  Loving yourself means loving flaws and all.  It means not comparing yourself to someone else. Maybe they are thinner, stronger, or prettier. Maybe others don’t worry like you do. It doesn’t matter because each of us are perfectly made in God’s image.

I’m a professed worry-wart! The worry I carry with me is so against God’s plan. In Matthew 6:27 we are reminded, “ Can any one of you add one single hour to your life by worrying?” The answer to that is a resounding no! It simply steals our joy! With all of the worrying I’ve done in my life, I’ve probably reduced it by years.  Worry steals my thoughts often. 

All of the worry I’ve had throughout my life has not just parked in my thoughts, it’s moved in like an unwanted house guest parked in a winnebago much like the Griswold’s cousin. Because of this, I’ve had a lot of anxiety lately. My chest tightens and my heart races. Sometimes I can’t even pinpoint the cause of it. My husband has always told me that he doesn’t have to worry because I’ll worry enough for the both of us. It actually started in my childhood. My dad would call me a candyass anytime I began to worry or feared something.  I’ve had great friends who have helped me over this hump. They are great at listening, giving much needed hugs, and simply letting me be me.

We have so much to be thankful for in our lives. Are we perfect? No.  We are going to be greeted with cloudy days that seem full of nothing but rainy negativity. On those days, remember that the day following many terrible storms is full of beauty and wonder!  Life happens. Bad things happen. But, if we celebrate the life that God has given us, we’ll no longer let cars of negative energy steal our thoughts and stay parked in our brains.  We’ll look past the worry to find the peace and hope that only God can give us! Think about it like this…even in the midst of an icy storm (if you get past the initial brrr of it all)  you find the beauty in the icicles, snowflakes, white colored trees, etc.

So late-lee I’ve been thinking a lot about 2021.  I’ve even broken my own tradition and started putting away all of my Christmas decor the day after Christmas.  Typically, I do this on New Year’s Day. My mom always told me it would bring me good luck. Well, I guess I’ve learned one big thing in 2020, is it’s not about luck, it’s about God.  It took one simple bottle of vinegar to remind me of this this morning. This past year has been full of so many things. It’s hard to see past the ugly to find the beauty in it all, but we must do that. He would want us to do that.  

Tonight at midnight, many will celebrate that 2020 is behind us! They’ll bid this year of pandemic and violence farewell, with the hope that 2021 will bring them everything they ever wanted including good health, prosperity, and love. Wouldn’t we all want that? Maybe we actually had that in 2020 and just lost sight of it.  

As I reflect on all of those personal things that hit so hard in my life, the ones that top my list are my husband’s surgery for cancer, my friend finding out during that same time, she had breast cancer, my friend losing her son, and Covid 19 infiltrating my family, but even in those moments, I can see that God was/is at work.  In all of those things, I see now the love that was woven into each of those events.  The phone calls, late night talks, hands held, smiles shared, dinners left and I could go on and on are all evidence of how people show their love for me and others.  It’s that kind of love that creeps into the crevices of our broken heart and mends it.  

Yes, undoubtedly, this year has been rough.  Personally, I feel like I’ve been on the struggle bus.  Wait! A bus moves much too slow to describe what it has felt like. Maybe I should correct that and liken it to riding a roller coaster, but not buckled in.  Imagine that…you are hanging on for dear life as it races upside down and you find yourself gripping the bar as you are dangling, then as it hits the straight away you fall into the seat briefly breathing a sigh of relief only to find another loop has swiftly arrived.  I can say that 2020 has been that way for me, but if I’m honest with myself, life has been that way.  In Jeremiah 29:11 ESV , we learn the verse: For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.  While we feel everything we experienced was unique and came out of nowhere, God knew even before he breathed air into our lungs that we would experience it. He walked through those experiences with us whether we felt his presence or not. When I felt all alone during these hard times, it was because I wasn’t reaching out to Him. He was always there. There is always love wrapped up into these moments too.

During the loops, I find myself really seeking God. I’m begging and bargaining (I know I shouldn’t do that) for Him to answer my prayers the way I want. But, on the straight aways, I fall silent. I don’t find myself talking to Him as much (I know I shouldn’t do that too) because maybe I feel like I don’t need Him.  Have you ever found yourself in this type of relationship with God? I know it makes him sad for me to be this way.  He will reveal himself to me in subtle ways. Just this morning as I am going through a list of ingredients for Red Velvet cupcakes, I realized I didn’t have any white vinegar. The thought of actually having to dress to go to the store wasn’t appealing to me, so I was trying to figure out what would happen if I left out the vinegar.  Any good baker (not me) knows that you actually need the vinegar to cause a reaction with the baking soda in order for a good rise to occur with your cake…okay, admittedly I knew that. I was just trying to figure out different options to get around it.

And, of course it made me think  about my relationship with God. See, during the moments when life is rolling along, and I’m not reaching out to Him, I’m missing out on the wonderful reaction. I’m not rising or growing in my faith.  I’m sitting still. One of my previous Sunday school teachers (who I loved) used to draw a picture of a cross on the board. He would mark an “X” that represents where you may be in your journey and then show where you may detour a bit by drawing another “X” out to the side. He would then say that there was no way to get from the “outside x” upward on the cross. You literally start where you fell off. So, I’ve been falling off a lot during my journey.  I hate to admit that, but I’ve always committed to being honest in these posts. So, there you go, more evidence of my imperfections. 🙂

So, instead of proclaiming resolutions of weight loss, getting rid of my diet Cokes, exercising daily, I’ll focus on what a New Year really needs to be about…it’s about God! As I make my cupcakes and pour in just a teaspoon of vinegar, I’ll remind myself that I need to do more than add vinegar to the batter. I need to be vinegar to others I encounter.  I will seek God daily and I will strive to cause positive reactions in any interaction I have. What about you? Want to be vinegar with me? Remember, we rise by lifting others so let’s do that in 2021!

It’s been forever since I’ve connected with you guys! I haven’t felt very inspired late-Lee, so I did some reflection. I love to do that from time to time. I usually sit by our pond and close my eyes. I ask God to reveal to me His plan. Romans 12:2 reminds us to do this. In it we find, “Do not be conformed of this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind that by testing you, you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” I find that when I’m feeling off track it’s because I am trying to be my own life pilot. Big mistake! Reflection is good for the soul. It’s an opportunity for you to see the blessings instead of the failures you might focus on.

During this time of year, Hallmark also does a beautiful job of making people like me, you know those gooey-hearted people who get lost in the twinkling of the lights, rekindled loves, and the scent and warmth of a yummy cookie kind of person, get into a festive mood! 

I have literally watched a Christmas movie every day this past week. It helped me find a zip in my step as I readied myself for work! It was soul-healing…heart filling! I find myself as happy as a hog in a wallow!

I am determined to relish every moment of life. A beautiful friend of mine, who lost one of her sons recently, challenged all of us to not waste a single minute of the assignment(s) God gives me. I will make it a point to honor her challenge in loving memory of her precious son!

So, here I sit pondering Thanksgiving and all that I have to be thankful for in my life. This past year has presented a unique set of challenges and changes! I refuse to see them as road blocks! They just mean we have to do things a little more creatively. Last year, I cooked a turkey for Thanksgiving for the very first time. I can feel you shaking your head in disbelief, so I attached a video here for you to see. https://youtu.be/TF1YLFsSN_A Roll your eyes or laugh out loud, it doesn’t matter. That bird turned out so yummy! I may just do it again this year. But, hopefully not! I would much rather my fella smoke that bird!

I am trying very hard to make it to Thanksgiving so I may relish this holiday too! You may recall from my post https://rhondalatelee.com/2019/12/07/be-the-light/ I had already decorated at this time of year. It was wonderful! The dreadful time change makes it so dark! I enjoy all of the lights used to decorate for Christmas.

Holidays can be wonderful! There may be family or friends that you get to finally see after what seems like a month of Sundays. In that same vein, you may very well wish some of these same folks would leave and not let the screen door hit them where the good Lord split them…bless their hearts! 

I am practicing total restraint. The urge to deck the halls is almost overwhelming! I have been listening to Christmas music already and as I shared previously, I have been watching Christmas movies. Yes, I have an addiction to the sparkles of the season!

Traditions are a funny thing. They are awesome if you are the type of person who likes to know the plan in advance. I mean think about it…you literally know a year in advance what you are going to be doing. I know that on Christmas Eve at 10 o’clock in the morning I will be making Christmas yummies such as cookies, fudge, pies, etc with my sisters, daughters, and granddaughter and nieces and nephews that were able to come. Before my mom passed away she would join us.  Which to me can make traditions kind of sad too. You try to continue with them even though you feel the void of those who are no longer living or those who can’t make it for some reason. That can be rough. You try to make yourself feel better by telling yourself they would want that, but would they? 

My mom always said it was bad luck if you take your tree down before New Year’s Day. Others say you shouldn’t leave your tree up into the new year because it drags the previous year a new one. Not sure about what you’re thinking, but I would like 2020 to stay where it is just like I made sure in 2013, my tree was down on 12/31. My mom died that year and I barely decorated. The following year I felt like I needed to go all out because she loved to decorate! In an odd way it made me feel closer to her! 

I’ve been on the search for some new holiday activities this year. I’m not sure if my family will be all together, so I want to do some things that are new and different.  What kind  of things do you do?  

Maybe those of us who are stuck in a traditions rut should be more adventurous and live in the moment. We can create so many new memories that way. And then we aren’t having moments that bring a little sadness to our hearts. We can figure out new ways to celebrate being together and honoring the memories of those we loved and lost. I think our loved ones would want us to live life and celebrate every moment we have together. After all, the next second is not a guarantee! Don’t put plans off! 

If you need some ideas, I’ve included some links to some really cool ideas on Pinterest for you to check out as you start thinking about how you want to proceed through this holiday season. Old traditions or new adventures, it doesn’t matter! Just live, laugh, and love what you do and who you are doing it with!  I’ll continue looking for more to share. 

https://pin.it/EU7iKef DIY Cedar Garland 

https://pin.it/5WhJNk3 Homemade Christmas tree decor – How to make Dried Citrus Ornaments 

https://pin.it/dkCCZIg Homemade Christmas tree decor – DIY Embroidery Hoop Ornaments 

https://pin.it/5rgedDb Homemade Christmas tree decor – Easy ways to decorate clear ornaments

https://pin.it/4BDNPmf Homemade Advent Calendar 

https://pin.it/33ZE62rhttps://pin.it/33ZE62r – 16 creative Advent Calendars

https://www.createcraftlove.com/christmas-traditions-printable/ Christmas traditions countdown calendar

Update: The urge was too much! Christmas decorating has commenced! Taking my own advice, I am living in this moment! What about you?

In some homes the kitchen is the heart! It’s where families gather to talk, eat, and hang out.  Before we remodeled several years ago, my kitchen was small and cut off. Now it’s a part of the entire living space. The island I selected has been the hub of numerous Christmas Eve baking episodes with many of the women in my family. We would clear the space, roll the dough out and create beautiful cookies made with all kinds of love.  Okay, well, that sounded a little better than they actually turned out…wink wink.  We’d actually get extremely tickled when they came out of the oven looking like puffed up marshmallows or snowmen that had turned into puddles, but tasty they were.  Santa liked them for sure. My daughters would choose the ones they created to leave for his arrival and awaken with pure delight to the crumbs left on the plate.  

I still have my mom’s rolling pin.  If it could talk, I’m sure I would finally get a hint of some of the secrets of her dishes.  She had it for as long as I can remember. She rolled out dough for cookies, pies, and her amazing dumplings. My mom liked to spend time with me in the kitchen.  She was an excellent cook! She’d give me a hard time if I questioned this or that. Try as she might, I never mastered homemade biscuits.  If she had to eat my wampum biscuits, I could see her cringe. I imagine she would rather butter my butt with a switch instead of that thing I called a biscuit.  If I asked her how to make one of her delicious recipes,  she would tell me she did one thing, but when my dish didn’t turn out like hers, I was certain there was something she would purposely leave out.  I mean if mine didn’t turn out, she would make hers and guess what I would join her to gobble it up, which meant some extra time spent together. Her mighty good dishes always had me asking for a tat more.  I would always leave her table full as a tick and with a big hug. Sneaky little thing…

Late-lee I’ve been thinking about my daughters when they were young. As an empty nester, I find myself doing that a lot. I ponder over the times we spent together and have some regrets about not spending enough time doing things like fixing up more yummy goodness.  I was often worn slap out.  I blamed it on the fact that our lives were so busy. I mean I worked 40 plus hours a week in education, drove them to cheerleading or soccer practice, and to wherever else their schedule required them to be.  I could have said no, but I wanted them to learn to handle themselves when life seemed hectic (i.e. balancing busy schedules), recognize the value of a “stick-with-it” attitude, and how to be a part of a team, which sometimes meant sacrificing your own desires for the greater good. I truly believed (and now I can attest to it) that those were qualities that when developed would help them become selfless kind-hearted individuals who would do everything they could to help others. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED! I’m very proud of both of them! 

Where I may have failed them was in the kitchen…LOL! Fortunately, they have more than made up for that on their own. But now, I have my sweet granddaughter to make up for my epic parent fails…tee hee!  I try to pick out things that we can make together when she is over for a visit.  I look forward to our weekly  “date nights” especially when I know we will be in the kitchen together. We’ve made little pizzas, cupcakes, mac-n-cheese among other easy dishes. This past week, we went a little further and that little stinker hung right in there for the entire time. I was reminded that it’s okay to make a big mess in the kitchen.  A little flour never hurt the countertops. The messy chocolate wipes easily from her face and hands and the chocolate chip I found when I opened up my laptop to write this was just a sweet reminder of our time spent together.  

I can only move forward with my daughters sharing recipes with them, cooking dinners and holiday meals together, and trying out different things they fix. I can’t get their childhood back, but if you have children, I can tell you that if I had it to do over again, I would steal away more opportunities to spend time with them fixing up some yummy love. Not only does it serve as a wonderful learning opportunity where they can learn about math, reading, and even science when you incorporate why certain ingredients are added such as baking powder vs baking soda (sorry, every now and then the teacher in me leaks out), the incredible memories you can make together are far more tasty than anything you could possibly whip up in a dish. 

When the television and radio are turned off, the conversations get turned up.  Reese and I talk about many things when we are together. She is at that age where she has so many questions and wants to help so very much.  I am so thankful for having this time with her.  I love telling her about the grandmother she never met. The feisty chic who loved her lipstick, manis, pedis, and her kitchen.  There’s a picture of my mom right by the sink in my kitchen because that was her favorite place to be and while I’m cooking, I talk to her. Every now and again I swear I get a whiff of her Estee Lauder perfume! 

If she were here with us, I’m sure she would say to me, “Rhonda Marie, don’t forget to let Reese lick the spoon!” 

So late-Lee I’ve been thinking about how much I miss walking down the halls at work and seeing people smile. I’m a smiler…I’m a big ole cheesy grinner! Did you know that smiling is #2 on the list of 43 Habits of Absolutely Happy People? Smiling has a ton of benefits besides just making us look better…LOL!

Have you ever been in a sour mood and then someone comes along with a huge smile, some laughter, or they just seem in a really good mood? Perhaps a baby looked up at you and smiled. When you realize it really wasn’t a gassy smile, how did this make you feel? Admit it. You know you smiled back.

When the person you are talking to or the people that surround you are smiling, you can’t help but smile with them. A smile has special powers. It can calm fear, insecurity, hurt and anxiety not only in yourself, but in those that are experiencing those feelings. The next time someone is feeling sad, scared, nervous, whatever it may be, smile with them and see how this makes them feel! When my mom died, I seriously thought I would never smile again. I even felt guilty when I did. But, what I realized is my mama would be very sad if she knew I wasn’t smiling because of her. I’m certain she would look down from heaven and wag her finger at me exclaiming, “Rhonda Marie, you better get your mess (er…she might say a different word) together.” And as soon as I would hear my middle name, I knew I had better listen.

A smile is a contagious action. Smile at the world and the world will smile back at you. I used to challenge the students I taught to walk down the halls smiling. We looked like a goofy group grinnin’ like a possum eatin’ a sweet tater, but we received numerous smiles in return. You will brighten the days of those around and make a difference in their lives… simply by smiling! When you’re smiling, no doubt you’re having a much better time than when you’re not! Smiling simply makes you feel better! Research has shown that smiling releases serotonin – a neurotransmitter that produces feelings of happiness and wellbeing. It’s like a circle of happiness. Smile and you feel happy, you feel happy and you smile! Even when you’re not feeling great, try smiling, genuinely, and see how you feel! 

Additional benefits of smiling: Lowers blood pressure, relieves stress, strengthens your immune system, and decreases pain. Since it takes at a minimum 10 muscles to create that smile, you can also claim smiling as physical activity. It only takes 6 to frown, so turn those lips upward and celebrate because you are burning calories!

So, what in the world are we supposed to do now? I mean masks are covering the smiles. I challenge you to let that smile appear in other ways. If you smile and speak at the same time, you have a happier voice. Not everyone can be as lucky as me. My voice is a happy voice (or at least that’s what I tell myself). It’s high pitched, so people tend to remember me as the girl with that voice. I had secretly hoped that the mask would take my soprano voice down to a Demi Moore raspy sexy voice, but all it did was, well…nothing.

Regardless of the mask or not, don’t stop smiling! There is too much in life to celebrate. In Proverbs 17:22, we find, “A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.” At my age, I have enough issues with my bones. I’ll stick with the cheerful heart! I often get picked on for trying to be a half full kind of girl! The reality is that just because I wear the smile, doesn’t mean I don’t recognize that there are problems, it simply means I’m choosing to look at them as opportunities and am thankful for what God has given me and guided me through.

Let’s start a movement…a monumental smile movement and see how many smiles we can share. Even with a mask, your eyes will share that smile!

So late-Lee I have been trying my hand at growing flowers.  Considering I’m 50, I would say that I’m definitely a late bloomer…tee hee!  Now, don’t get me wrong, I have dabbled with them over the years. My Mama worked hard to help me acquire the beautiful green thumb she had, but I think the color faded by the time it got to me. Both of my sisters are gifted at growing flowers, but when you come to my house, it looks like the forgotten land. Over yonder at our barn, you will often find a thriving garden that my husband and his friend tend to seasonally.  They have grown amazing veggies! But on this side of the land, the outcomes are not quite the same. I’ve bought beautiful flowers that I have planted and enjoyed for a couple of days only to watch them begin to wither away. So the cycle has continued…until now…

A couple of months ago, my husband and I spent an entire day clearing out this one flower bed. We were busier than a cat on a hot tin roof.  We cut shrubs back that had grown into trees and marveled at the fact we could actually see windows again.  The downside to that is that they needed cleaning terribly. (So, that’s another project on my list. Argh!) I was pretty certain that if his hands participated in this project, I would have better luck. I didn’t tell him that though. I wouldn’t want him to get a big head!   We dug that bed out so that it was clear of all weeds. I have admit it was quite therapeutic. It was like a purging of all the bad stuff and don’t we need to do that in our lives from time to time? After lining it and filling it with mulch, I bought beautiful flowers and planted them in pots because I haven’t had much luck with them in the ground and to my amazement they are still alive. I’m tickled pink at the success I’m having!  I’m thankful for the many rains we are getting because I know that it’s those rains that are keeping them in good shape.  I like to think that rainwater is kissed by God, so they receive a real blessing everytime it happens.  

One flower has really stood out to me.  My husband has even commented on it a few times.  It’s beautiful. It’s yellow and sunny looking! The odd thing about this flower is it is literally floating in the pot because the pot has filled with water.  It leans outward searching for it’s daily dose of sunshine.  It’s not a water plant and in fact I planted it in soil, but where it’s located the water just falls from the roof so all of the soil has worked it’s way out.  I am amazed at its will to not only survive, but thrive in its new environment.  I’m not sure what to do, but naturally, it has me thinking.  

Aren’t we like those yellow flowers? When we find ourselves living in times of the creeks rising, we often find ourselves uprooted. We may move to a new home or to another part of the state or country.  We may change positions or jobs entirely. There may be times in our lives when we find ourselves grieving the loss of someone we love. Perhaps a divorce has caused your world to turn upside down.  You may find yourself simply worn out. During those times, the roots that kept us firmly connected are suddenly searching for something to grab hold of tightly.

Seeing those flowers serves as a reminder that when we find ourselves uprooted, we can still bloom.  We may find ourselves in a new season, but it doesn’t have to be a time of survival. It can be a time of revival!   In 1 Peter-1-23, we hear from Peter.  He is reminding us that we were brought into the world by a perishable seed of our parents, but through God, we can be born anew  through an imperishable seed only God can provide.  

If you find yourself in a season where your roots are floating in water, use the soil of God’s word to help ground them in faith.  You’ll find yourself blooming in a way that brings joy to those around you just like my sweet little yellow flower does as it welcomes me home each day.  

So late-Lee, I have been dealing with anxiety. This may come as a shock to some, but the reality is many people who look like they have their act together may be falling apart on the inside. Fortunately I am not in a million pieces, but I do have a piece falling out of place along and along. My husband has told me more times than I can count that I am as nervous as a long-tailed cat in a roomful of rocking chairs. I am not looking for sympathy (or rocking chairs for that matter) just setting the stage for my story.

Yesterday, we took our jet ski out and enjoyed a beautiful pre-tropical storm day out on the river! Unless I have checked Weatherbug and know of a good chance of storms, I am totally chill on the water. It’s the one place I am not anxious or stressed. One thing I always get a giggle about is anytime we are riding the ski, out in the boat, or riding four wheelers, etc my husband turns his hat around and without the need for anymore words, I know it’s game on so I had better hold on! Yesterday was no different! That hat was turned around numerous times. He likes to go faster that butter melting on a hot biscuit!

So naturally in my element when the ski is racing through the water, I do my best stress-free thinking. My thoughts have been all over the place late-Lee. I think about our healthcare workers who have been dealing with Covid-19 for months now. Within the last month the surge our area has seen has challenged them, but like true heroes, they brave every shift they work with courage that even Superman couldn’t match. Being the mom of a nurse who has volunteered to work with these patients caring for them and (as I try to remind her every time ) bring in a little light of sweetness to them, I find myself worrying about her but she reminds me that she can do this! I realize in the future I will have another daughter who will one day end up working with very ill patients as a nurse too. She knows she, too, will need to be that same source of light. I am pretty sure my knees will be calloused from the knee-mails I will be sending to God. But, I have to remind myself what God wants us to do! He wants us to be a light for others here on earth! As a mom, it brings joy to my heart knowing what one of my nursing daughters is currently doing and then it swells like rising yeast at knowing my other daughter will join her in these battles one day.

I have been blessed to be a part of two professions that at the very root of their service is something called, “heart work!” That kind of work is truly special! But I continue to see the already stressed and worried posts by teachers, some of whom I know personally,  and others I do not know at all. I know their fears are real and should not be ignored.  If I was with them now,  I would remind them that they, too, are called to be a source of light for the students and fellow staff they will interact with daily. Like patients need their nurses, providers, and other healthcare team members, students need their teachers, paraprofessionals, administrators, custodians, etc. 

Stress is often the result of the unknowns, so arm yourself with the knowns! Wear your mask, sanitize your hands often, wear goggles or a face shield and know this…like patients, your students will get to know your eyes! They will see them sparkle and will notice how your nose crinkles at the top when you smile! They will hear the smile in your voice and feel the love through your words! Love and kindness can coexist even when the mask is on! Make sure you do welfare checks on one another. Things will happen that may cause you to have little pieces falling out of place on the inside. Chances are if it is happening to you, someone you know is having the same problem. We can look put together for a while, but eventually our eyes may leak a little. We don’t have to go through it alone. Be someone else’s glue and they will be yours.

So, how do you ease your fears and move forward to face the challenges you will undoubtedly face? You need to turn your hat backwards and lean into the wind! Treat the obstacles you will face as welcomed challenges. Show your students that when life gets hard, we can either crawl back under the covers or we can throw them off because we are tough as pine knots and meet the day like you are on the best ride of your life!